It's been a funny few months. Odd rather than funny-ha-ha. There have been some really high bits - and some really deep lows. I have seen friends and neighbours end their dances with life one way or another, which has been responsible for many of the lows - it's pushed me around the counselling loop again, with varying degrees of success. I have also seen some wonderful things happen - some people very dear to me have had better results in their fights with illness, which has let a fair amount of sunshine into life every so often. I've seen new little people arrive in the world, with all the happiness (and vague sickly smells) that they bring. One of the great joys is that I have found a whole bunch of friends that I had lost, thought that they were consigned to memories of younger days, but they're not - they are still here, and still just as wonderful!
I don't propose to sit down and type up all the events of the last few months... that would just be boring. I
I am trying to move into a world where cancer isn't the be-all and end-all of life - where I can have headaches without panicking, and where everybody has finally forgotten that I used to be bald. It was a little while ago... and I am trying not to let it rule my life. But it will always be there, and I can't just "get back to normal" - "normal" is different now, and it will always have the shadow of the cancer fairy in the corners - I just need to try not to visit that corner quite so often.
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